The questionnaire to Vale Ortega from @valeortega
Motherhood has made me: a more focused person. My priorities have changed and it was at the right time. I also have a tremendous duality: now I am a little more fearful, I always think of the worst-case scenario, but I am also the first to face any danger that may arise. It's amazing what motherhood can do!
As a mom, I'm great at: routine. Although we don't have much in our house, the one we put together over time fits us perfectly. I discovered that I'm very good at telling stories and tales, I see them really enjoy bedtime. But my forte is pampering them.
As a mother, I am terrible at: knowing what they want. I have learned this over time, but I would like them to be born with a manual. That is what has been the hardest for me, because I like to always have everything under control and having children means losing control of everything.
Something I wish someone had told me before becoming a mother: that it would be so difficult. In general, motherhood is very romanticized and many times what makes us grow and learn as mothers are the most difficult moments. During pregnancy, in general, we worry about giving birth, then about breastfeeding, but making them grow, healthy, making them advance in their growth milestones is 24/7. The worries are much more intense.
The phrase from your children that melts you: I love you (and then a kiss)
I can never say no to my children when they ask for something and then tell me "I love you", I simply surrender to them.
Since we became mothers/fathers, my relationship with my partner has changed over the last 3 years and a bit more. We have been through many extreme situations that come with motherhood/fatherhood, but we have overcome them and I think that only now are we getting back to having a relationship like the one we had before the children.
What I said I would never be like as a mom, and now I do: turn on the TV for them, give them sugar, have hundreds of toys, dress them in bright colors.
My favorite maternity gadget is: I've gone through many, depending on the age of the children. From the breast pump, to the stroller. Today it's the stroller that has a skateboard and can both ride comfortably. We walk everywhere!
Do you like routine or do you like to go with the flow of day to day life? I like routine, but on weekends I prefer to go with the flow of day to day life, even more so when we make plans with Jon (the children's father).
Raising children in a bicultural family is challenging, but very entertaining, learning about both cultures, traveling, having a good relationship with relatives outside of Chile, keeping them close even when they are far away.
Raising bilingual children is: a little difficult, especially since everywhere there is a new and better “way to do it,” such as the native father speaking one language and the other speaking the other language. We worked with our own routine with the children, mainly because the father travels a lot. Every family is a unique and different unit.
What characteristics of being a mother have helped you in your career as a communicator? A new world of content has opened up for me. Communicating motherhood in the most honest way according to my context has been a great help. I have felt very identified with other mothers and, although motherhood is very lonely, I have felt supported digitally. I have been very interested in communicating some aspects that I have gone through as a mother, or how I have solved everyday problems. That also generates company and community.
Best motherhood advice I've ever been given: follow your instinct. It's cliché, but it's worked for me. Even more so in times when there's an overabundance of information, new trends that pressure you to do one thing or another, from how you should live your pregnancy to how to feed your children. Within normal limits and common sense, of course, it's better to go with your instinct than with what worked for a friend or family member.
My favorite motherhood cliché is: hiding candy or chocolates so I don't have to share them with the kids. Or waiting for them to fall asleep so I can have a glass of wine filled to the brim, watch memes or videos and laugh my head off. It's a very real cliché and I love it.
My most unpopular opinion about motherhood: that there are good days and bad days; wanting to get your life back as a woman, as a couple, as whatever, is not wrong; wanting to get your body back after having gone through one, two or 10 pregnancies is okay, don't let anyone tell you how to feel about your body if you're not comfortable; that it's okay to argue that you chose to have children, no matter how much you want (I've heard a THOUSAND times from people, friends, close ones and not so close ones, who respond after you complain about something, lack of sleep or whatever, "oh but you wanted to have children:) and the last one, the most controversial: having pets is NOT the same as having children. Oops!
